It was my friend Monty’s birthday, sometime in the summer of
1989. Monty was from the country. He
loved to hunt, fish, and ride horses.
The horses we had in common, everything else, not so much. Monty had decided to have his birthday party
at an indoor firing range in Fort Worth. I went, if for no other reason than to
see what it was like.
I had never been to a
firing range before. The only experience I had with guns was firing a couple of
shots at a tin can with my grandfather’s .22 rifle. That was a long time
ago. Now I stood in a booth, ear muffs
on, pistol in hand, ready to shoot. I don’t remember whether or not I hit the
target, I remember the recoil, jarring and sudden. I remember the noise,
booming even through the “ears”. Holding that weapon I was awestruck by the
idea that something so simple and small could be so forceful. Here was the
power to take life, to maim and cripple, to alter family histories, to alter
world history, and it fit in the palm of my hand. That thought humbled me, in fact it terrified
me. I was uncomfortable. I did not like
the feeling of having the arbitrary power to end something, or someone’s life.
It did not belong to me. What right did I have to a power like that? More
importantly, could I trust myself with a power like that? It was the last time
I picked up a gun.
So I am not a gun person.
Does that make me un-American? Am I a “sissy” because I don’t like to
shoot things? According to some folks in
my great home state of Texas, the answer is yes. Recently members of the “open carry” movement
in Texas have been holding very public demonstrations, exercising their right
to walk around with long rifles, assault rifles, and the like. They have mugged
for pictures inside restaurants and coffee shops, they have marched in the
parking lots of Home Depot’s and they harassed a former Marine in downtown Fort
Worth because he had the audacity to question the sanity of their brazen
disregard for the safety and security of their fellow citizens. This particular group of people actually
accused the NRA of being too soft after that organization called the groups
tactics into question. Wow.
I have questions for open carry advocates. These questions
are not asked in the spirit of accusation but in the genuine interest of
understanding your position. You want to be able to display your weaponry for
the entire world to see. Why? I really
don’t understand. Is it for protection? I would think if someone wants to take
you out being able to see what you’re packing and where it is on your person
would actually put you at a disadvantage.
Is it fear? Are you so afraid of the bad people in this world (and yes,
there are bad people in this world) that you feel your only recourse is to
strike fear into the people around you, be they man, woman or child, guilty or
innocent? I hope your reasons go beyond
intimidation and antiquated notions of old west justice. I am for your rights, but please don’t tread
on mine.
I think back to that birthday party at the gun range and I
remember this; it was not the gun that frightened me. It was the thought of
what I could be capable of with that gun that scared the hell out of me. So when I say I am uncomfortable with the way
you are expressing your rights, I am not saying it because I don’t trust the
guns, I am saying it because I don’t trust you. I don’t trust you to always, always think
safety first. I don’t trust you to always, always keep your emotions under
control. I don’t trust you to always,
always value human life, even if it is the life of someone you hate. You want to have guns? Fine. You want to carry them openly in public?
Ok. Just know that along with that choice comes the burden of a greater
responsibility that you can even fathom. I’m simply asking that you take that
responsibility with the seriousness it deserves.
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